I chose an alternative vaccination schedule for Abe because, frankly, he’s my only child and I have the time to go back and forth to the doc’s office a few extra times. This week Abraham woke up with a rash. I didn’t think anything of it becuase, as a friend told me when Abe was 3 months old, “If he gets a rash, don’t worry about it because it will eventually go away. And don’t worry if he doesn’t sleep. He will eventually. Everything eventually happens.” Good advice from a father of 4. 🙂
When we arrived at the office we were whisked right into our room (never happens). I asked the nurse who was weighing him if she minded taking a peak at his rash. She looked briefly and said, “Oh. That could be eczema. Or it could be from something he ate. Do you have a new laundry detergent? I’m not really sure. Let me get Jen.” Esentially she named everything on the planet it could be in order to cover her bases and then left. Extra good work there, Nurse WhoeverYouAre.
So we waited in our room a few moments until Jen came in. She smiled and ask to see the rash. She stared at it for for a while, touched it, and then asked how long it had been there. “You know,” she said, “this could be just a contact dermatitis rash.” This is, in fact, useless information when I don’t know what that means.
“What is contact der…whatever you said.”
“Oh, it means whatever he touched there caused the rash.”
“So, anything that he touched in that spot is why he has a rash? That could be anything from grass to a knock-off perfume you buy at CVS.”
“Yeah. Could be anything.”
We stared at each other for a minute while I thought to myself sooo, what now?
“You probably shouldn’t do that vaccine today. I’m not sure what this rash is.”
“Oh, really? Oh ok, no problem. We won’t do it if you think it’s…”
“Well, I can ask the doctor. Do you mind waiting?”
“Sure, we can wait.” Famous last words. Twenty minutes and all 5 books in the room read 3 times each later, I was running out of material. We tried taking off Abe’s pants. We played with his socks. I sang pat-a-cake, itsy bitsy spider, and I’m a little teapot in rapid succession. He ate all the Veggie Booty. We tore up a magazine (not our magazine). We played How Far Can I Bend Mommie’s Arm Backwards and When Will Mommy Scream if I Bite her finger. Finally after almost 45 minutes, the doctor appeared. It had been so long I wouldn’t have been shocked if the rash was already healed and gone.
“Hi Ms. Cohen! Let’s see his rash there.” She looked, felt, etc.
“So what do you think? Should we do the shot? He’s already so fussy because we’ve been waiting and it’s almost nap time and…”
“Oh, this is probably nothing. I think it will be fine to get the shot. No problem! Thanks, and have a great day!”
Have a great day?! I’ve spent over an hour trapped in a room with a 17 month old and now he’s going to get shot in the leg. This is not going to be a great day, I can assure you. So, in the future, take my friend’s advice. It will eventually go away. And take my advice, too. Don’t even ask.