It’s a Lot of Curse Words…

1b527e0I saw repeat posts on social media today about a certain celebrity being robbed at gunpoint in Paris. The post was a cartoon man with his middle finger in the air and the words were something like, “I couldn’t care less Kim Kardashian got robbed at gunpoint.” I can’t go back and find the picture to show you because I actually unfriended one of the people who I saw post it.

We weren’t close, anyway.

The other people appear to have already taken the post down and I didn’t want to Google it because what if i die tomorrow and the police search my computer and think I’m the type of person who searched, “I don’t care that Kim Kardashian got robbed” the day before I went…

Look, I don’t care if you’re a celebrity, a philanthropist, or a medical genius who is currently putting the finishing touches on the cure for assholery, you don’t deserve to be robbed. You don’t deserve to have things taken from you. You don’t deserve to be scared. You don’t deserve to be victimized. And if, GOD forbid, that ever happens to you…you sure as hell don’t deserve high school-level cartoons being passed around by millions of people proudly proclaiming they don’t give a rip about you or your situation. (Believe me. I had cartoons about me literally posted around in high school. Like, on walls. It sucked when it was a few hundred kids…I can’t imagine it being the whole free world.)

Piggybacking off my recent acknowledgement of EVERYONE having to find fault in EVERYTHING, I’m also noticing that everyone is an asshole. Everyone. Hop on social media for a minute and you’ll notice that not one single type of person can do anything without someone else diagnosing them as being an asshole and then telling everyone.
You’re an asshole if you make a lot of money.
You’re an asshole if you just HAVE a lot of money.
You’re an asshole if you have any amount of money but you don’t give a bunch of it away.
You’re an asshole if you’re poor and need help (because you should work harder).
You’re an asshole if you have too many cats.
You’re an asshole if you own a gun.
You’re an asshole if you don’t own a gun.
You’re an asshole if you pay someone else to clean your house.
You’re an asshole if your house is messy.
You’re an asshole if you go to church (or temple or synagogue or mosque).
You’re an asshole if you don’t believe in anything.
You’re an asshole if you work out.
You’re an asshole if you’re thin but you don’t work out.
You’re an asshole if you’re fat and you work out.
You’re an asshole if you’re pretty.
You’re an asshole if you try to be pretty.
AND NOW. You’re an asshole if you’re a celebrity who gets robbed at gunpoint and has millions of dollars worth of jewelry stolen.

I just have one question for all the people out in the world who are constantly determining and posting their own latest definition of asshole: why do you have so much spare time?


If you don’t like Kim Kardashian, don’t watch her show or buy her products. If you don’t like people who are fat but work out, don’t look at them. If you don’t like people who have money but don’t give any to you, then go make your own money. If you don’t like guns, don’t buy one. Why are people so OBSESSED with critiquing everyone around them into a square so tiny that no one even fits anymore?!

Because they spend too much time thinking about the things they don’t have. That’s why. And in the absence of what they don’t have (and very much want), they find that blame and ridicule feels better than personal responsibility.
Personal responsibility would mean Kim Kardashian is NOT, in fact, to blame for your lack of a Gucci purse and private jet. She is not an asshole for enjoying those things, either, because I bet you’d damn well love a private jet and you’d enjoy the hell out of it if you had one, too. (Even if it was a private jet you didn’t earn but someone gave you.) You may not like the way she lives her life or raises her children or spends her money, but guess what? She hasn’t thought about you once today. Not once. So maybe your energy is better spent thinking about how you could align your own life with the things you really want instead of the things you’ve decided you’re not allowed to have (because having any more things would make you an asshole).

No doubt, I want big diamonds and fancy cars and amazing vacations. And I’m slowly building a life that leaves room for those things. You can do that, too. But I promise you, the Universe matches your every vibration. And when you send blame and ridicule and hate out into the world, the Universe does not send back a private jet.
The Universe unfriends you and moves on.


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