I Grabbed Lunch, Let the Dogs Out, Bought a House… (Part 1)

It was a normal Saturday for us, y’all. Bear was running a cornhole tournament. I was helping him and planning to run home to let the dogs out midday. It was also the day our real estate agent (who we will call Ruben) was going to call and make an offer on a house…THE house…the one we wanted so much.
We’ve been looking at houses for about 3 months. We haven’t gotten too serious, but we also have taken steps to securing a loan (you know, when the first lender told us we didn’t have enough debt…). And then we found this house. An awesome one. We didn’t QUITE have the loan figured out yet, but we knew we had to make an offer. Ruben said we’d figure the money out later.
We wrote up the offer on Friday afternoon and Friday night, Ruben called. “Well, I spoke with the seller and…you won’t believe this. She has a kidney infection. She can’t meet until at least Monday, maybe Tuesday.”
“So no offer?” I asked.
“Not yet. It’s ok, though. Keep looking through the MLS listings in case something pops up between now and then.”
I did as he suggested and found a house that looked nice as I sat on my couch late Friday night watching Into the Woods. I emailed him the listing.
“Looks nice,” Ruben texted. “Want to try and see it tomorrow?”
“Sure. I have to let the dogs out around lunch and this is near the house. Maybe 1pm?”
“I’ll be there,” he wrote.
I left the cornhole tournament the next day, Saturday, near lunchtime to look at the potential house and let the dogs out. Bear was up to his eyeballs running the tournament so I didn’t figure I’d bother him with pictures or details until later that afternoon. If we liked it, I’d show him Sunday.
Except then Ruben and I walked into the house…
“Woooooooah. Wow,” Ruben said.
“Holy wow…”
“This place is…this is nice. Look at, WOAH. Look at this. What am I looking at? What is this?!” Ruben flung open the curtains to a lanai the length of the house.
“Oh look at the…”
“This is incredible, wow…”
“I don’t believe this is…LOOK AT THIS!”
We didn’t stop for 15 straight minutes. Until, Ruben turned to me with a serious face. “You need to put in an offer.”
“Ok, well, Bear can be here before church in the morning…” I started.
“No. Now. Someone is going to snatch this house up. I know the listing agent. I’ll call him. But we need to put in an offer. Now.”
“Yeah, see, no. I can’t do that. I have to talk to Bear…”
“I get it. I get that. But you’re not going to find this house again. You want this house. I promise,” Ruben said.
I should back up. Ruben and I have been friends for about 7 years. He is a SEASONED real estate agent who has built a successful business from scratch. I’d trust him to buy us a house without us ever seeing it. He knows the market. He knows the system. He knew we had to get this house.
“I guarantee you this house is being shown all day. This neighborhood, this side of town…this place will go today,” Ruben interrupted my thoughts.
I peered out the window in silence. Another real estate agent pulled up. And a car behind that one. I saw the real estate agent’s face…
“Yeah. Ok…” I said.


Dont worry. The dogs were fine. They didnt even care.

We drove to Ruben’s office, which happened to be across the street, and he began writing up the offer. I sat, alone, on the same side of the desk that Bear and I occupied together the afternoon before where we drew up an offer for a TOTALLY DIFFERENT HOUSE. One that didn’t even compare to this one. Ruben rattled off details while I stared at my phone, wondering how exactly I should text Bear that I was making an offer on a house that he’d never seen. “You know the other thing? There aren’t hundreds of houses on the market in your price range. This is not a buyer’s market. When you find a house that’s underpriced and move-in ready, you have to take it right now.”
Now sufficiently terrified that we’d lose the house and never find another one, and more than sufficiently in love with it, I texted Bear:
“I know this is crazy, but I have to make an offer on this house today.”
Ruben called the listing agent as I waited for a response. “Hey, Jerald, this is Ruben over the Best Realty Group Ever Realty (names changed to protect the innocent). This house you have over on Queen’s Landing…you have any offers in on it right now? I’ve got a very good friend ready to make an offer…”
“What?!” Bear texted back.
“Can I call you really quick?” I texted.
“I’m running a tournament.” I could tell he was frustrated and confused and more than anything, quite WTF with me.
“Oh you do have an offer?” I heard Ruben say. “Ok, anything about the house I need to know?”
“I swear, babe, if you trust me this is a good choice. Remember, this is not a commitment. If you hate it, we don’t have to buy it.”
“Right, so have they accepted any offers before?” Ruben continued…
“Ok. If you say you love it and you know I will, too, I trust you. Do it.” Bear texted.
“You’ll have our paperwork here in a few, Jerald. Thanks.” Ruben hung up. I looked at him.
“Let’s do this,” I said…
“Wait a minute! We don’t have a loan!”


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