I had a phone call with my boss that blew my mind this morning.
I’ve been working for her for 6 months, and essentially she works with small business owners to get very clear on who they are and what they wish to offer the world by way of Carl Jung’s Archetypal Theory. Everyone falls into one of the Archetype categories, and it is there that “who you are” is very clearly illuminated. Perhaps you’re a Revolutionary or a Warrior or a Romantic. What I’ve found over and over again is that when people learn which Archetype they belong to, they suddenly feel this intense and almost effortless permission to be who they are. It’s like a validation of what they’d like to be and perhaps have been ignoring, suppressing, or even disliking.
Once you learn your archetype a few things tend to happen. It could be that you then entirely shut down to the truth of who you are because it’s too hard to stop being the pretend-version of yourself you’ve been being for so long. It could be that you take the results with a grain of salt and gloss over it as not being worth much (though it will then haunt you for months to come). OR, you will feel an invaluable ease, lightness, freedom to live life just as you like embracing exactly who you are.
I am a Jester.
When I learned I was a Jester, I chose to gloss over it. I didn’t entirely disagree with it, but I didn’t find that it described who I primarily am. I am organized, on time, precise, A-type, and reliable. The Jester isn’t a party animal who shirks any and all responsibilities. A Jester is someone who finds joy in having fun. And it wasn’t until my boss said this to me this morning that I completely understood who I am in a brand new and unquestionable way: “You know, Erin, not everyone finds joy in just going and having a bunch of fun.”
“What?!” I asked. “What else would they find joy in?!”
“Well, I find joy in sitting in bed and reading a book far more than having a bunch of fun,” she said lightly.
“Sure, but you also enjoy having fun, right?!”
“I prefer learning.”
“What?!?! Wait, you’re blowing my mind. What else do people want to do besides have fun and read books to experience joy?!”
“Well, an Alchemist probably enjoys transforming a room or a person’s life more than going on about having fun. A Nurturer probably enjoys caring for others more than attending a party,” she began and went on and on…
“Ok. So, wait. You’d rather read a book than go to a party?!”I asked.
“Yep. And I’d rather host a party than attend one.”
My mind almost blew out of my ears. It suddenly became so much clearer to me how different every person on this planet really is. I mean, I knew we were all different, but I assumed we all liked going to parties. I assumed everyone sort of hated meditating but did it anyway because it’s “good for us.” I assumed everyone wants to go out to lunch as opposed to eating at home when given the choice.
I have spent years and years in my work and life trying to measure up to a standard. I have tried to be a nurturing mother, an organized housewife, a reliable employee. And it’s not that I’m NOT any of those things; I’m simply not those things according to the world’s rules. I will nurture my son, but I will do so by playing with him (not snuggling him). I will clean the house, but if there’s something more fun to do then I will probably do that first. I am an INCREDIBLY reliable employee. I will NOT miss a deadline. But I won’t mention that I’m going to complete the project 2.5 moments before it’s due instead of spreading the work out over the week prior. And none of that makes me wrong or less-than. It just makes me…Erin.
“So you wouldn’t go out to lunch if you had the chance?” I asked her, astonished.
“God no. I’d much prefer have a sandwich in the kitchen by myself,” she responded.
I’m learning more and more about myself, or rather ACCEPTING more and more about myself each and every day thanks to the experiences the Universe is giving to me. And I’m so grateful because it’s all starting to come together that I actually am OK just the way I am.
If you’re interested in learning your Archetype, my boss has a free test that she created on her site to learn about your Archetype. You do have to opt-in to an email list in order to gain access to your results (which are very thorough and an interesting read) so you can always unsubscribe to that if you aren’t wanting more information in future newsletters. Watch the video first and then fly through the test using your intuition – don’t overthink it. I hope you experience the kind of clarity I am just by having my true self reflected back to me.
Have a beautiful weekend.
Oh, and here’s a little book about Archetypes.