Explaining Easter to a Three-Year-Old

photo (1)Abe! Do you know who is coming tomorrow?
A very special surprise!
Who?! Who?! Robin?
No! Tomorrow is Easter!
Yep! And tomorrow, the Easter bunny is coming!
Oh. Ok.
Abe! The Easter bunny!! So exciting! Aren’t you excited?!
We have to go color the Easter eggs!
Color eggs?
Because…because that’s what you do on Easter! For the Easter bunny!
Because…the Easter bunny loves colorful eggs!
Oh. Ok.
And after we color them we’ll put them in a basket for him to see and then…
…a basket?
Yes. An Easter basket.
And then they’ll hatch?!
No. They’ll be hard boiled eggs.
I only like the white part.
Not to eat, son. They’re to leave for the Easter bunny to see!
Because…I don’t know. Because he likes them. And then, if you get a good night’s sleep, he leaves you goodies.
Because…the Easter bunny leaves you goodies when you color the eggs.
When do the eggs hatch?
They don’t hatch, Abe. We just color the eggs with dye.
Why do they die?
No, not die. Not like die. We color them and the color is called dye. It’s a different word.
A different word?
Yes. And then you get goodies from the Easter bunny!
What are the goodies?
Oh, who knows?! The Easter bunny gets to decide!
Chocolate cereal bars?
Maybe! But maybe something else like toys.
Like the Octonauts?
Well, no. Probably not that. But he will leave you goodies in a basket and then you get to go on an Easter egg hunt!
Because…the Easter bunny hides the eggs.
Because…that’s what he does.
And then they hatch?
No. The eggs never hatch.
Why not?
Because they’re hard boiled.
I only like the white part.
I know. I know that, Abe. But you get to color the eggs and then hunt for them.
I don’t know. I don’t have any idea what this holiday is about.
Is Robin coming?
No. Robin isn’t coming. The Easter bunny is coming.
And we go to the park with the Easter bunny rabbit?
No. We just hunt eggs.
Just. Nevermind. Let’s just go dye the Easter eggs.
Why do they die?
THEY DON’T. THEY WERE NEVER ALIVE. Forget it. Happy Easter, Abe.
Happy Easter, Mommy!

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