Holy crap it’s day 3. Is day 3 the hardest? Day 3 better be the hardest.
6:15am – Abe can’t find his pacifier and flails around in an incoherent moan until I traipse upstairs, climb nearly entirely into the crib to find a pacifier, and fall asleep in a chair rocking Abe back to sleep.
7:30am – Abe is up. We’re all up. I could really use coffee. We get Black Tea instead of Green Tea this morning because daddy made a run to the grocery store last night. I also hate Black Tea, UNLESS it has CREAM AND SUGAR. The British would be appauled at the way we drank, no, abused the tea this morning.
8:30am – Abe has eaten 2 eggs, half an avocado, half a banana, and some cheerios. I’ve had 3 cups of spinach and 1 cup of berries in the blender. I want french toast.
10:30am – Leaving for the office. Late. Hungry. Eating nuts on the way to work.
11:00am-4:00pm – I don’t stop drinking green drink, water, or eating nuts and berries for the entirety of this 5 hour period. Except for a half an hour in the middle when I eat an entire bowl of Hippy Soup. For being on a cleanse, I sure am eating a lot.
5:30pm – I’m home. I want chicken. With butter and garlic. And some red wine. I eat avocado, tomato, steamed beets, squash, potatoes, and green beans instead. Then for dessert my husband sneaks me a piece of celery with peanut butter. Don’t tell the nutritionist.
8:00pm – I want chocolate, popcorn, spaghetti, and flan. I don’t recall if I’ve ever had flan, but I’d like to try it. I’ve heard that day 3 is when the real toxic-exodus occurs and can cause the worst cravings and most irritability. I’m pretty sure my husband can confirm the irritability part. But, I mean, honestly if he wasn’t so damn annoying with all his chewing and the whole touching my foot with his foot when we sit on the floor crap then I wouldn’t have to yell.